the greatest state on earth...

i am not one of those people that think texas is the greatest state on earth, that it's God's country and just feel sorry for all the people that aren't blessed enough to live here. i promise i am not one of those people. i mean i like it as much as the next person, people are friendly here and it was a great place to grow up, but i promise i am not one of those people.

however, yesterday i was absolutely in love with texas. yesterday, february we had the best weather ever. it was warm and sunny and in february!!

i thought seriously about quitting my job so i could go outside and play.

i decided to just wait until i got off work to play since that would be the responsible, adult thing to do. also i like to eat everyday and my job plays a major role in that enjoyment.

but then the time came, i rode a borrowed bike. i ran a little bit, i reveled in the warm weather. all the while i was dressed in shorts and a t-shirt...in february!! colorado may have its glorious mountains but can you play on them in shorts and a t-shirt and without frozen snot creeping down from your nose toward your mouth in february? i think not!

so yes, yesterday i probably would have told you that texas was the greatest state in the world.

where are the men?

the first time i heard the pastor jr vasser preach he asked this question. tony evans believes it is a crisis in our world today. that the men are simply not stepping up and taking the role God has given them. instead they are running and hiding. (i know not all of them are doing this but a lot of them are)

tony (the minister to high school students at the church that i work at) spoke about this tonight to our youth. well actually he spoke about david and how he did step up to fight goliath and how men need to follow his example. and he said to the girls that david is a biblical example of the qualities they should look for in future husbands.

as tony talked i sat in the back and looked out over our kids. i laughed as i noticed that the girls were quiet, still, listening intently.

the boys were laughing, playing and pretty much forgetting that they were in church. ugh

seriously? i mean, seriously?

this is our theme for the student life camp we are taking our youth to this summer...

im pretty excited about this, for our kids and my self as well. the culture we live in today teaches, more like screams at us that the world should revolve around us. the sad part is that as believers in Jesus Christ we are also believing these lies.

Jesus said,

"If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me."
Luke 9:23

"For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many."
Mark 10:45

Jesus makes this point again and again, that as christians it is NEVER ABOUT US.


NEVER, NEVER, NEVER.

we are to be always putting others first.

but the world tells us something else. and we are inclined to listen to their messages.

i have spent a lot of time thinking, conversing and praying about this over the past few months. i am noticing that when i am upset about something or i think someone has wronged me or i was somehow not given justice that at the root of those frustrations there is a train of thought that i deserve better. there is the inclination that life is about me and this should just not have happened. plainly, that is a lie. mercy Lord please. let me not inherit what i deserve, without you i am a liar, adulterer, murderer and so much more. what i deserve is an eternity in hell without a second of relief.

PRAISE THE LORD that is not what i have waiting for me. that because of the precious blood of Jesus Christ, instead of what i deserve, an earthly lifetime of dreading death because i know all that waits for me is a lake of fire, i have a lifetime of hope awaiting the day i will be with my savior.

how can i know this and still think the way i do? why do i believe this and still act the way i do?

Lord, please remove in me every selfish thought. please retrain my heart, mind and soul to be as you were, a servant of others. please make it obvious to me when my thinking is in opposition to what you would have me think and the attitude you would have me walk in.

mercy, mercy, mercy i beg.

why...why, why?

why do people do this to their dogs?

seriously, if you do this please, don't.

it's not cute.

babies are cute.

dogs in clothes are just unhinging. it unhinges me.

next time you have the urge to do this, if you are a believer please, adopt a baby instead. aslo, i don't mean to offend, but it is my blog and today i was at the park and now this is what i am thinking about. there you have it.

just not sure yet

i am still deciding if i want this to be a blog i update often with everyday happenings or if it just something i use when i feel like i have words pouring out of me and i want to share them or at least get them down.


for now, i am just going to post some pictures.

luke purposed to ashley and she said yes so they are officially engaged!! i am pretty excited about this, i adore ashley and she is going to make the most fun sister-in-law ever!!

and my little brother is being a grown-up which makes me so proud of him and want to cry all at the same time.

this kid is the greatest.

his new fiance says that when he is around me, his big sister, that it brings something out in him that is a quality she doesn't always see.

"you bring out the butt hole in him!"

she says this as she apologizes for the way he has us both squished between the couch and one of those 36" rubber balls people are now using for exercise which means they are in the living room. for luke, to have a ball in the living room, and his sister and then expect him to not use one to torture the other is unthinkable. i try to get mad but then i look at him and he gives me a look like, "isn't this the most fun you have had all day?" and in and instant i know that it is so i just laugh until i can barely breathe then laugh some more.

and its true, in my life of also attempting to be a grown up and going from work to errands to more responsibilities to be around him and immediately be 12 years old again is just a delight.

tomorrow we are going rock climbing. i am excited...and scared.

being sick in warm weather

yesterday i got sick.

i hate being sick.

i threw up.

not only that, i was sick on the most beautiful day.

it was the perfect day for a run at the park, sunny, warm and in december!! warm days in december, i believe, are little treats for us that live in a place as boring and flat as ft. worth. there are no cool state parks here where we can hike. no mountains to look at, nothing cool like that at all so having it be t-shirt and shorts warm in december is a perk and i had to spend it laying in bed watching a movie. it was double lame. one lame for throwing up, one lame for being inside on a beautiful day.

new blog

so i now have a blog. we will see how it goes. as i grow older it seems my friendships are much better than they used to be but also quite spread out across this globe. this is my attempt to keep up with these people i so dearly love.